How Long Does A 15 Year Old Teen Boy Lasrt Using NLP and Public Speaking to Reach Out to Teens

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Using NLP and Public Speaking to Reach Out to Teens

Over the last 15 years I have had the great honor of talking to and coaching many teenagers. Many of them are angels who are deeply moved by what you say. Others are completely nonchalant about the need for change. It is precisely those who are nonchalant, rebellious and give an attitude that have spiced up my speaking career.

Over the years, I’ve also come to realize the correlation between teenagers who belong to the latter type and their family history. It saddens me to no end that there are many teenagers who are simply completely emotionally disconnected and have nothing to look forward to except the immediate pleasures of life that satisfy their needs and desires in the short term. Many of them come from divorced families, broken homes, children or abusive parents, and some have even seen the horrible reality of death and murder.

One should be prepared to reach out to teenagers of this type. Are you able to handle the emotional burden of addressing them? Because as much as you can talk to them and inspire them, they will certainly have different circumstances in their lives that you cannot change. And sometimes, as such teenagers need, you may actually need to establish a longer-term intervention process.

I recommend that your first step be to provide a large number of reference points. These reference points should contrast with their current life circumstances and act as a counterexample to their beliefs. In NLP, counterexamples are ways to build new references for new, desired beliefs. They need to be told with as much passion and life as possible, but also keeping in mind that their old beliefs might make them give up on new opportunities.

I like to use “Heroes Journey” by Joseph Campbell as the structure of my stories. I’m talking about how a teenager crawled out of a bad place and became a millionaire. I’m talking about how a child who witnessed his father’s murder became a bully, but later learned to be a good man. I’m talking about a sister whose brother was abused by her mother because he wanted to protect her from abuse. These emotionally wrenching stories are the ones that open up the map of the teenage world and allow them to see future possibilities.

Of course, it’s not all nice and spine-tingling just telling those stories. The messages you need to sow within these stories are subtle and require a lot of thought. If you don’t do it well, you end up creating even more uncertainty. The concept I’m sharing here is known as nested loops. If you can create them and flexibly shift from emotional state to emotional state, you’ll find an amazing array of transformations that will happen for your teens, and for you too — when you see a new sparkle in their eyes!

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