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Resolve to Divorce Amicably in 2012 and Try Mediation
In the New Year, divorcing couples who can do so amicably can use mediation to make the divorce process far less contentious. This process is far more attractive than a long, drawn-out courtroom battle. Mediation not only removes unnecessary stress, but also saves money and time. For many, it is more of a team concept of both spouses, a mediator and several sessions to iron out the specifics of the divorce.
The mediator will provide guidelines for reaching a resolution on issues that still need to be worked out. They bring critical negotiation skills to listen to each side’s interests and concerns and then help find a common solution that each person can agree to. The mediator is a neutral party, and often a lawyer, so they will be able to provide you with the background of what is legally allowed. When impasses are reached or negativity stops progress, the mediator knows how to get the conversation back on track. For some couples, this means not doing mediation all in one day. But in two to three sessions you can solve all the big dissolution priorities.
It is important to know what your future needs are so that child support, spousal support, and the division of assets and debts can be done to help you find as stable a future as possible. What many people like about mediation is that it allows you to express your values and opinions. In contrast, a contested divorce follows a stricter formula and what some call a “one size fits all” approach. Mediation makes more sense for two adults who can be in the same room together and share the details. You can consider the budgets you live with on a daily basis and the future needs you and the children will have. Mediators also know how to look for tax savings and alternative settlement options to increase the chances of financial stability after divorce.
Couples who have gone through a mediation divorce say it’s far better to have two people who know their finances and assets intimately decide how to end their marriage than a judge or a couple of lawyers. At the end of the mediation process, a final divorce settlement will be drawn up and approved by the courts. Months later, you’ll thank yourself for doing mediation. The money you save can go towards the children, a savings or emergency fund, or towards accommodation in a new home.
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