How Old Should Boy Be When Stops Seeing Mother Naked Free To Be Me – The Art of Being Cosmically Alone

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Free To Be Me – The Art of Being Cosmically Alone

I have a personal mantra that is so important to my sense of peace. I know there is a principle of truth in this maxim that works for everyone, so I will share it. It’s simply this: “I am cosmically alone.” These words give me the incentive to seek, and the ability to find satisfaction in none other than God, that is. I will not allow the restlessness towards others that I feel in my heart to affect my own peace. Additionally, and importantly, it’s not just me in condition To be alone; I actively seek it every day because I have learned that it is an enjoyable, fulfilling and healthy spiritual discipline.

I was first inspired by a quote from reading a newspaper. This is the life axiom of the director of an Australian art gallery. I took a slightly different and perhaps more spiritual meaning from it compared to the original meaning of the quote.[1] This does not mean at all that I think that life revolves around me, or that I to feel alone. This motto simply helps me give others space and respect, and helps me maintain my sense of life balance and shalom; through two things: 1) maintaining healthy independence from people and situations; and 2) by being comfortable being alone for some part of each day.

This is an example of the first way it works. Let’s say you have a problem in a critical relationship with a close friend or family member. You have tried to present certain questions to them and always without success; they never responded the ‘right’ way.

In reality, you can’t do anything about how they feel. Actually, there’s a good reason – it is to take as an attack on their person, and will probably never respond the way you see them needing to. They need time to come to their own understanding of the problem and its effects (on you, themselves or others), and time to decide if it’s even a problem for them. Second, this idea has application because it helps you not to make comparisons that could cause envy in you, whether it is about the material possessions that the other has, or the quality of character, or the relationship. Regardless of mentors and appropriate role models, we should not compare ourselves to other people.

This basically means that I am trying to maintain a healthy independence from people and circumstances, which basically speaks of my responsibility only to God. I try to remain distant enough to preserve the worlds of others, and certainly my own. I try to ask myself, ‘How important is this question (to me[2]) in the overall scheme of things.’ Very rarely are things important to us that should invade other people’s spaces – even in marriage or in parent/child relationships. This is in theory, a in total another person’s respect for who they are. That doesn’t necessarily mean we can’t challenge things. That means we can say something, if it’s appropriate, and say it respectfully even then leave that with the person themselves to think about and decide what to do with the feedback.

All you can do is draw attention to the problem and then let it go. Leave the problem to that person. Tell yourself, “This is not mine problem.” Give them the respectful space you can. The outcome is peace for you and peace for them and a win/win outcome.

Another way the idea works is in To be alone. Being alone is not fun for some people. They feel bored, lonely or even scared. For various reasons, they have not learned to quiet their hearts, and simply “be”. I have learned that one of the best states I can reach is mentally and spiritually requires to be alone. I feel such peace and contentment in silence and stillness, meditating on powerful truths, such as the presence of God, for example. Being alone is never really the case – he’s always there talking if we’re willing to listen.

God has said that he will never leave us and never completely forsake us – in other words, we have nothing less than his complete spiritual presence with us. If we believe, he can guide us in his love, goodness, mercy and grace. If we believe, we can use its power to find peace in solitude, ideally at least 30 minutes a day. Also, if you have a busy life, being still and quiet and alone for a while each day is a nice relief from the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

It is appropriate to conclude with this: The basis of this idea is that I am responsible only to God. I believe they all are, simply because we came into the world alone and that is how we will leave it. This is what the biblical character Job alluded to when he said: “I came out of my mother’s womb and I will go naked.”[3] He goes on to say that whatever the Lord gives he also takes away, and blessed be his name. For all these reasons I strive to please God.

It is an undeniable truth; no matter what we acquire in our lives, ‘all the pieces go back into the “monopoly” box of life’ when we die. If only we could live with this kind of knowledge at the forefront of our minds more often. I’m sure our hearts would gradually respond in harmony. We would make better life choices, especially in how we invest our time, not to mention money. At the end of the day, we will all answer to God. We are all, each one of us, alone with him.

Things to consider going forward:

When you feel that you are too dependent on others or that you are negatively influenced by situations:

  • Ask how important this question is mespecifically?
  • Ask yourself: If I let this go, will it make an impact me negative? If I release it, will it affect a it depends on me negative?
  • If you answered “yes” to the above question, you could look for the right moment to confront the person with feeling and respect, and then leave them.
  • If you answer “no”, learn to let go of the problem.
  • Are you guilty of comparing yourself to others and does it cause envy? If so, acknowledge and actively work on these feelings. Recognize that envy is dangerous for both you and the other person – it’s always a lose/lose situation.
  • Other considerations for inner peace:

  • Can you slow down and review/plan your day, your year; your life?
  • Are you able to be still, quiet, alone? How reflective are you?
  • If you can do these things, are you able to ‘get into the experience’ every time and really enjoy it? If not, don’t give up. In the end, it will be pleasant, especially if you discipline yourself to relax.
  • Being alone with God is essential in the spiritual journey. Without it we cannot be so spiritual. It takes practice. It takes discipline. But once you begin to see the benefits of being alone, you may not need to make comparisons with others, and you may not see the problems of others as such high priorities for change.

    The greatest thing you will gain is this: God will give you the power to be ‘free to be you’, with the associated benefits, including self-acceptance and self-empowerment.

    © Steve J. Wickham, 2008. All rights reserved worldwide.

    [1] The actual quote is, “No matter how much you surround yourself with people, at the end of the day you are cosmically alone.” – Alan Dodge. It was a quote his mother always urged him to use. (Also cited in the article: Loneliness: Practice detachment and master it, Online reference: Wickham, Steve. (2008, January 6). Loneliness – Practice detachment and master it. EzineArticles. Retrieved February 1, 2008, from http://ezinearticles.com/?Loneliness—Practice-Detachment-and-Master-It&id=912912.

    [2] The things that are important to me are the things that I am responsible for; things that I believe God holds me accountable for. Other than these things directly, I may not need to worry or intervene.

    [3] Job 1:21a (TNIV).

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