How To Get A 3 Year Old Boy To Listen Disciplining Children: 3 Tips for Raising Thick Skinned Kids

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Disciplining Children: 3 Tips for Raising Thick Skinned Kids

Delays, failure; it is every day from birth to death. Alan dropped about a thousand freckles. Baby cries and doesn’t get milk right away, failure. Eighty-year-old Elizabeth loses all her savings in a stock market crash, a bust. You think skin is needed from the start to protect children from life’s hard blows.

Let’s make sure we know how to make the best thick skin for your child before we get to the tips.

All parents know that children are very sensitive to having their feelings hurt. This inner part is where parents must begin to develop their child’s thick skin, making the child feel strong from within. But don’t let him think he’s better than everyone else; it requires teaching humility.

Then there is the outer part, the part that gives the best answers to people when attacks happen. Answers must be strong, but not hurtful. This can be tricky, but it’s doable.

Now for three tried and true tips.

1. Learn about self-esteem from the inside. Focus on strengths, especially during discipline. When your child turns two, write down all his strengths and find ways to notice them every day. When your teen yells at you for limiting texting time, say, “It’s so great that you have so many friends, but we need to set texting limits.” Inner strength is the foundation for real thick skin.

2. Teach external responses with thick skin. Give your child coping tools and practice daily. Make sure your child can tell you anything from the start. Liz sobs at the dinner table about her first day of high school; two kids said her dress looked silly. Follow these two steps: (1) listen to and validate her inner feelings (strengthens inner value) and (2) role-play externally. Teach her to say, “I really like my dress,” as she turns around confidently. Thick skin comes with practice.

3. Learn compassion and humility-the bloodstream of true happiness. Caring for others mixed with “you matter as much as I do” is a recipe for an abundant life. Show and tell will activate your child’s inner compassion. Examples: Schedule a monthly afternoon to help an elderly couple. Or, when your teen is saying how mean the teacher is, point out how the teacher lost her father in a car accident and how that can make her nervous.

Your child needs a thick skin to live an abundant life. Make sure its basic ingredient is compassion.

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