How To Get My 4 Year Old Boy To Listen How to Be a Mother and a Best Friend

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How to Be a Mother and a Best Friend

Can you be your child’s best friend and mother? I remember going through that phase as a child when I wasn’t happy with my parents. I didn’t really talk to them about anything that was really going on in my life or share my feelings. As time went by, I really found my best friend in my mother. What a gift this is for me! We would go to many places together like shopping, movies and at home we would watch TV together. How angry I was at myself for wasting so many years not nurturing her and sharing my life with her.

When I had children, I promised myself that I would do everything I could to be not only a good mother, but also a best friend. My mother died young by today’s standards and I was heartbroken thinking about the time lost in my younger years. It would set a path that I was determined to follow and to be to my children what my mother, who was my best friend, was to me.

Of course, parenting must come first for us to understand and follow this concept. There must still be discipline and rules. This does not mean that you always say yes to your child when he asks for something. This goes much deeper than your normal day-to-day family life. I’ve made it a point to really listen to my kids, yes this can be trying sometimes, especially now that my teenage daughter is telling me things that almost make my eyes pop out of my head. Since they were little, it made sense for me to go into their rooms and talk to them about their day, not just schoolwork and how they were feeling at the time. When they told me secrets, yes, I mostly kept them to myself, unless it was something that really needed to be shared.

I made it a point to be alone with them outside the house as often as I could. This could be a trip to the store or a meal, just with one of them so they can keep me to themselves and talk freely. For my teenage daughter, I go into her room and have what we call “Pow Wow’s” where she can ask me anything and I do my best to answer her questions honestly. Now her girlfriends come and call me into the room for questions they have and are afraid to ask their mothers. Earning my daughter’s trust, we will continue to grow closer. She knew I was someone she could come to and not judge, but listen and actually help with experienced advice. I also became the designated parent to drive for them, sometimes at crazy hours I might add.

This is something I was lucky enough to start very early on with my kids, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t work when they are older, I’m living proof that it does since I lost so many years of time with my mother as my best friend too. I just personally think it might have happened sooner if I had been more comfortable around her during those difficult teenage years. The years pass very quickly and there is no better time than today, to make an effort, take the necessary steps and choose to be a part of your child’s life, instead of watching him from the outside of his world. Of course, remember, you’re still a parent, but with trust, time, and love, you might just be their best friend.

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