How To Stop A 2 Yr Old Boy From Screaming A Feline Soap Opera?

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A Feline Soap Opera?

Live with animal communicator so everyone agrees?

There is no doubt that integrating cats can be very, very challenging. In my last post about Melissa’s integration, I thought I had finally made a digression. Well, maybe it was just another corner in a complex maze.

In the wild, domestic cats naturally live in multigenerational female family groups, like lions. But when they are confined indoors and the cats are not related to each other, conflict can be difficult to overcome.

In our human families, we bring together cats that are not biologically related to each other. This can present great challenges, as it is not natural for them to live this way.

When Starlight came out almost 5 years ago (So long ago? Really?) and was quickly integrated in about 2 months, I could hardly believe it was that easy.

Of course, there was a lot of preparation, even before her birth. Moreover, Starlight has a very sweet personality. He doesn’t like to challenge anyone in anything. So, naturally, the existing hierarchy was never questioned and all was well.

Then Melissa came.

Melissa is a very dominant cat by character and perhaps genetics.

She wanted to take over the kennel where she was born.

Then at 6 months she expected to dominate all 3 cats in my family.

Despite my best efforts to dissuade her, Melissa knew exactly what she wanted and she wasn’t about to give up.

She refused to listen to anything I had to say (perpetual teenager?) and still screams at me when I start telling her something she doesn’t want to hear.

Sometimes I get an image of a child having a tantrum, screaming and putting his paws (fingers) in his ears.

From her first day here, Melissa had never shown the slightest bit of subservience to the top cat, Sakhara, and had never set out to do anything but run the household.

I explained that there are different ways to express dominance and that violence is not always the best way. But of course, with “paws in her ears” Melissa did not hear me and completely refuses my requests.

Melissa is now over 2 years old.

Melissa is now the dominant cat.

Her relationships with Violet and Starlight are generally well-balanced and respectful.

However, with the Sahara, the conflict continues unabated.

Sakhara refuses to officially relinquish his position.

Melissa continues to spank Sahara at least once a day, and does her best to do so. Even if Sakhara is sitting on my lap minding her own business, Melissa will attack. I can see in Melissa’s eyes and body language when she’s about to strike.

Nothing I did to stop it made any difference except for this moment. If I hiss at Melissa or reprimand her, she backs off and then just waits while I’m not looking.

Due to Sakhara’s age and overall health (around 21), I am still working on the interference. For me, Sahara is due for some respect, because she was always kind, caring and attentive to others.

Sakhara decided to sleep in the room with the door closed. This way she doesn’t have to walk past Melissa to get to the litter box after I go to bed. I’m okay with this, but when I open the door for her in the morning, Melissa runs past me at lightning speed.

In my efforts to resolve things between the two, I discovered a past life in which Melissa and Sakhara had a terrible conflict that resulted in horrific torture and death for Melissa. Melissa is unforgiving, and Sakhara won’t forgive herself either.

So the karma continues.

While I have not completely given up on trying to help each of these beautiful beings find inner peace, there is a powerful lesson for me in all of this. While meditating one day, I was told to use this affirmation:

“I accept God’s perfection in everything.

I let go of the need to fix everything.”

A really powerful lesson. It’s not for me to solve. It’s up to them.

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